On the Ethics of Gelatology

As the world opens up in the wake—we hope it’s the wake, anyway—of the COVID-19 pandemic, I expect to reinitiate my forays into the fascinating world of gelato studies.¹ As I begin to sketch out my research plans in the shadow of the pandemic, however, I am acutely aware that there are as yet no ethical guidelines for gelatologists even as it is increasingly and painfully obvious that it is impossible to study gelato without profoundly affecting the specimens we look at. Indeed, as far as I know, no gelati have ever survived contact with outside observers. Not one single one, and it makes no difference whether the observer in question is a serious scholar or just a simple onlooker.

Let us examine some basic facts. First, to reiterate, gelato seem completely unable to survive close contact with humans. Second, humans have been consuming gelato for as long as the two species have coexisted, and it thus is easy to conclude that gelato consumption is an unavoidable consequence of the natural order. But even a moment’s reflection suggests that this conclusion is problematic, if not entirely erroneous: humans do not need gelato to survive. Consider: humans originated in Africa and gelati in southern Europe, and even now it is impossible to find gelato of any sort in much of north America (and, I presume, other parts of world as well). Third, as far as I know humans consume gelato not for sustenance but rather for pleasure. While it is true that some substances that are consumed for pleasure also serve more practical purposes,² I know of no such benefits from gelato. Rather, there is ample evidence that consumption of gelato and its cousin heladiensus can have negative and sometimes long-term consequences for human health. And fourth, I have yet to come across any gelati that are not kept in special preserves designed explicitly to facilitate access for humans interested in gelato consumption. Whether of the sort that are carefully bred, like the Amorinum variety discussed in previous posts, or existing in a more natural state like the many small colonies found in Italian cities, gelati clearly seem to have a symbiotic relationship with their human predators. Stepping back, however, I see no evidence that they exist for anything other than human consumption and pleasure.

That the fate of nearly every healthy gelato is to perish—literally to disappear—in human hands³ is no excuse to ignore their needs before they meet that end. Indeed, I think there can be little doubt that when human caretakers treat their gelati poorly prior to preparing them for consumption the gelati suffer; and that suffering often is noticeable in many ways, from flavor to texture to expected time of survival outside of the gelati’s special environment. With many animal food products—eggs, milk, meat—it might not be immediately evident whether the animal source was well-treated or not; with gelato, it most often is evident on casual observation whether the treatment was good or poor. And it seems to me that this both makes the ethics of breeding and raising gelati clear in a way that perhaps might not be so clear for other human-raised species where the connection between treatment and quality is less obvious. I think it important to note, moreover, that the pressing need for ethical treatment of gelati at all stages of their lives also speaks to the need for ethical treatment of other species. We might keep them for consumption, as companions, or as objects of admiration, but it does not seem far-fetched to suppose that treating them in a way that makes them better off will make our interaction with them better as well. It might not be as obvious as it is with gelati, but that doesn’t make it less important.

For the researcher interested in the natural behavior of gelati the question of ethics takes on a particular urgency. Though I know of no IRB that has included gelati, and much less the field of gelatology, in its considerations or guidelines, no serious scholar can dodge the ethical questions involved in gelato research. Gelato research for the most part does not examine the breeding and care of gelato colonies and immature gelati, but rather the fully formed, mature specimens. The essential problem is both simple and devastating: to observe a fully formed gelato is to condemn that specimen to death. And while all researchers I know of at least choose specimens that they are willing to consume and thus avoid wasting gelati lives, two key questions remain: First, does observing adult gelati—which, to repeat, inevitably results in their demise—affect their behavior in ways that make any observation spurious? And second, does the willingness or even desire to consume the specimen lead to unacceptable bias for the researcher and any conclusions s/he might draw?

I do not know the answers to these questions. Hence the need for an ethics of gelatology. I do, however, have some initial thoughts that might be helpful going forward. With respect to the first question, the possibility that observing the subject will change its behavior and render all observations at best problematic is hardly unique to the study of gelato. For the moment, I have been proceeding under the assumption that to be consumed by humans is part of the natural gelato life cycle, so not unnatural. It does raise questions about the scholarly responsibility to look at more than just adult gelati, but those I leave for future research. And as for the second question, the only response I have for now is that it is incumbent on the researcher to be open-minded, even daring. Whether this can fully eliminate bias is questionable, but it should make samples more representative and thus reduce any impact of bias on final conclusions. And since at present all research is at best exploratory, those concerns remain far in the future.

¹. As noted in my previous post, my ability to continue gelato research depends in part on the availability of funding. Now, thanks to a generous startup grant from the Vertice Alto Rendimiento group, I am confident that I soon will be able to start investigating the proliferation and behaviors of gelati at least in eastern Massachusetts.

². Alcohol, for instance, kills bacteria and probably has helped humans to suvive or at least remain relatively healthy where drinking unadulterated water would have unpleasant consequences.

³. Those gelati that do not exit the earthly plane as victims of a human feeding frenzy tend to do so in even less pleasant ways. Initial observational data suggest that the most common fate for those gelati that escape the clutches of their human predators is a long fall to the pavement and a slow, apparently painful death by puddling.